Sunday, September 18, 2011

One Fucking Year.

One year.

I cannot fathom,
this ridiculously quick,
passage of time.

When I was a child,
a year was an eternity.
And now a year,
seems like the blink,
of a jaundiced eye.

What was yesterday,
is so far away;
and still I  can feel it all,

I want to go home.
I want to go back.

I ache so deep
that trees shudder as I pass
and concrete cracks and heaves under foot.
The weight of my broken soul,
could crush stars into dust
and melt diamonds.

I have spent a year,
pretending and hiding.
I have spent a year,
trying to bury my broken heart.
I have spent a year,
digging a hole
in the water out back.

I have spent a year,
one full year,
precariously perched
out here on the edge
of being,
and not being.
I have lived a year,
a complete full year,
in exile.

And yesterday,
I signed the lease
for one more;
another year.

I have so much to say,
so much to express,
so much to share.

And here I am,
at a loss;
on the edge between love and life.

One year.