One Fucking Year.

One year.

I cannot fathom,

this ridiculously quick,

passage of time.

When I was a child,

a year was an eternity.

And now a year,

seems like the blink,

of a jaundiced eye.

What was yesterday,

is so far away;

and still I  can feel it all,

everything.

I want to go home.

I want to go back.

I ache so deep

that trees shudder as I pass

and concrete cracks and heaves under foot.

The weight of my broken soul,

could crush stars into dust

and melt diamonds.

I have spent a year,

pretending and hiding.

I have spent a year,

trying to bury my broken heart.

I have spent a year,

digging a hole

in the water out back.

I have spent a year,

one full year,

precariously perched

out here on the edge

of being,

and not being.

I have lived a year,

a complete full year,

in exile.

And yesterday,

I signed the lease

for one more;

another year.

I have so much to say,

so much to express,

so much to share.

And here I am,

at a loss;

on the edge between love and life.

One year.